Have you noticed that being busy is seen as a badge of honor in our culture? And we sometimes even see it as a sign of importance. My husband and I have four kids between us, and I worked full-time outside the home. Boy, do I know busy. The kids were all involved in activities, so it seemed that there was somewhere to go most evenings. Not to mention, figuring out dinner, doing laundry, cleaning house and squeezing in time to exercise. There was always something that needed to be done. If I sat down for very long, I’d start feeling guilty that I wasn’t being “productive”. I was so tired that I would basically fall into bed each night. Since things have slowed down and the kids are gone (at least most of the time), I have really been into resting. I think those 20 plus years of going at breakneck speed really wore me out!
Let’s consider the story of Mary and Martha.
“As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, ‘Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!’ ‘Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her.’” Luke 10:38-42
Are you a Mary or a Martha? I’ll bet that, if I polled ten women, that there would be a lot more Martha’s than Mary’s. I know for sure that I’d be a Martha. First of all, I probably would have never invited Jesus and his followers into my home because I hate to entertain. I always feel like things have to be perfect and get stressed out. Secondly, imagine the pressure of having Jesus Christ, the Son of God, at your house! I’m sure I’d also be scurrying around and getting miffed at Mary for not helping me.
I think that we, as women, are built to serve others and often take things on ourselves that aren’t always necessary. We value getting things done and keep ourselves constantly on the move doing things with and for family, children, work, school, community, and church. Plus our minds are constantly spinning trying to keep our schedule and commitments straight, while we have a constant influx of information from media and the internet to process.
Although Martha was working diligently to serve others (which certainly isn’t a bad thing), she wasn’t focused on what was most important – Jesus and his presence. Other things have a way of working out and falling into place when our primary focus is on Him.
In Matthew 6:33, Jesus says “seek first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.”
Getting our other priorities clear is essential to helping us to lead a more balanced, less busy, life. Ask yourself, “What are my main things?”
- If you could focus on one thing and one thing only, what would that be? – Hint, this one should be God.
- If you could add a second thing, what would that be?
- A third?
- A fourth?
- A fifth?
Now that you know your priorities, consider dropping any commitments and pursuits that didn’t make your list.
Here are some other strategies that you might consider to better balance your life.
- Outsource – Hire others to take care of some tasks so that you can focus on what’s most meaningful.
- Bundle – Kill two birds with one stone (i.e., volunteer for a community service activity where you will also get some exercise).
- Learn to say no – Consider saying no to things that don’t fit in with your priorities.
- Delegate tasks – Delegate tasks at work and home when possible. Make the kids and spouse help out! Regrettably, I didn’t do very well with this.
- Manage your time – Some suggestions include:
Organizing household tasks efficiently
Running errands in batches where possible
Relaxing your cleaning standards (not a problem for me)
Keep a weekly calendar of important dates and to-dos
- Get enough sleep – A good night’s sleep is a gift from God (Psalm 127:2). And Jesus himself was not opposed to getting some shuteye, even when a serious storm threatened him and his disciples.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in hear, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.’” Matthew 11:28-30
REFLECT
Determine your top five priorities and think about commitments that you might adjust or drop.
Which of the strategies listed could you use to obtain a better
balance?