Self-control involves delaying an impulse or gratification for a greater purpose or cause. When we exercise self-control, we are saying “no” for the sake of a greater “yes.” Self-control isn’t easy. If more people demonstrated it, the prisons, hospitals and courts would have a lot less business!
I can fairly easily exercise self-control as it relates to some things. However, I struggle where it involves chocolate, coffee, wine, shopping and sometimes my mouth (meaning what comes out of it). Full disclosure here, I really like wine. I got to a place where I was having a glass of wine often as my chill-down time – and it wasn’t necessarily the recommended serving size. I have been praying about the things where I lack self-control and recently two of my favorite boutiques closed. If wineries and coffee shops start shutting down, I MAY be to blame!
I am also pretty good at justifying my lack of self-control. I love to shop for clothes and shoes. I justify times when I have over indulged by telling myself things like, “well, we could need a new roof and we don’t” or “I’ve had a rough day and deserve to have that chocolate bar or glass of wine”.
Does God really care if I exercise self-control as it relates to these types of things? I think He must, or they wouldn’t be on my mind as things that I should better control! Sometimes I think that he has us put self-control to work in everyday things so that we will be ready to better exercise our self-control muscles in the spiritual race ahead of us.
If we want to be successful as Christians, we definitely need to cultivate self-control. It is mentioned as one of the fruits of the spirit in Galatians 5:22.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.”
There might be a reason that it is the last fruit of spirit listed as it is likely the hardest to master. Self-control requires spiritual maturity and reliance on God to help us garner the strength to deny ourselves.
Jesus is probably the only person who ever demonstrated perfect self-control throughout his life. The Bible says he had no sin. (2 Corinthians 5:21) Think about all of the self-control that he had to muster to have no sin! Especially when he was tempted by Satan in the wilderness.
In Matthew 16:24, Jesus told his disciples “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.” I think this means that we must “take up our cross” in our thoughts. When thoughts that aren’t pleasing to God come to our minds, we should put them to death on an inner cross, thus exercising self-control.
We are tempted by things of this world every day. Once we give in and Satan gets a stronghold in one area of our lives, he will work as hard as he can for his influence to bleed into other areas for our lives.
“For everything in the world – the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does – comes not from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of God lives forever.” 1 John 2:16-17
Matthew 5:29 says:
“If your right eye makes you sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose part of your body than for your whole body to go to hell.”
No thank you, don’t want to lose any body parts! We should examine our lives for anything that causes us to sin and take any action needed to remove it immediately. And exercise self-control to make sure it doesn’t happen again!
In order to develop self-control, we must recognize our weaknesses. Some of us are tempted by binging on food and/or drink, others by gambling, others by shopping, others by sex – the list could go on and on. If we are aware of our temptations, we will be able to take our struggles to God and ask for His help in overcoming them.
What if you fail in your quest to demonstrate self-control? Unfortunately, we are likely to fail at times. Ask for forgiveness from God, forgive yourself and move on!
“Prepare your minds for action and exercise self-control. Put all your hope in the gracious salvation that will come to you when Jesus Christ is revealed to the world.” 1 Peter 1:13
REFLECT
What is one area of your life where you are succeeding in the exercise of self-control?
What is one area where you would like to exercise more self-control? What will
you do to achieve this?
