How well do you know yourself?
A lot of us go through life not really understanding ourselves or why we do what we do. For many years, I basically operated on autopilot and didn’t really think about who I was or my purpose in life. I defined myself by the roles that I was filling at the time – mom, wife, employee. It wasn’t until I became an empty nester that I started getting to know myself better.
As I became more self-aware, I realized that there were some narratives in my head that weren’t serving me well. I discovered that shame and rejection from previous experiences in my life were affecting me. I also determined that I was also defining myself by my achievements in life – rather than as a daughter of the King. Having self-awareness about these challenges helped me to create a plan to begin to move past them.
So, what can you do to become more self-aware? Here are three suggestions:
- Cultivate a deeper relationship with Jesus
I believe that the journey of self-discovery begins with knowing and understanding Jesus. I began cultivating and deepening my relationship with him which truly helped in the quest to understand myself and my purpose better. In fact, when I began doing this, I felt an unwavering nudge to write – and unfortunately also felt led to brand myself as a hot mess. Now, I feel that sharing my struggles to help others with theirs is my purpose, not necessarily just through writing but that is certainly part of it. All this to say that I truly believe that spending time with God and asking Him for clarity will help illuminate some things for you. - Take assessments (the Enneagram)
There are other tools that can help in learning more about yourself. I recently discovered the Enneagram which is an assessment that studies the nine basic types of people. The Enneagram gives us a deeper understanding of ourselves and others. Through this assessment, we begin to understand how to deal with situations better and see life from a broader point of view. I am a Helper (type 2) with an Achiever (type 3) wing which is right on the money. I was intrigued and recently was certified as an Enneagram coach and facilitator (hint, hint, if anyone wants to explore, hit me up). - Do some self-reflection
Self-reflection is also helpful in exploring what guides and motivates you as well as what is not serving you well. Journal and ask yourself questions like – Who am I really? What motivates me? What do I do well? What don’t I do well? Why am I here? Where am I going in life? After you respond in situations, reflect and think about what went well and what you could improve in the future.
The Bible says to “put off your old self…to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness” (Colossians 3:9-10). When you discover your faults, temptations, blind spots, and negative thought patterns, pray through them, and ask God to help you move past these things so that you can grow into your full potential and be who He created you to be.
REFLECT
What are you going to do to become more self-aware?
